The Secret To Living Your Best Life
The Living Authentically Story Series continues……. Sarah and Sam had been together now for 6 months. It never ceased to amaze them how synchronicity played such a large part in their lives. It was like their life was being orchestrated at a much higher level. The people they met and places they went always seem to give them something that allowed them to reach a deeper place of authenticity.
They had often discussed this and concluded that synchronic events happen when you let go of control and trust in a higher implicit order. Sarah and Sam had learned that sitting behind every need to control was some type of fear. They also discovered that fear is a future based thought. They reasoned a destination based mindset perpetuated most people’s fears. Many people had heard of the saying: life is a journey, not a destination. However, Sarah and Sam had observed that few understood its true meaning.
Most of the world was still stuck in destination and goal mode. Life was a series of achieving one thing after another. People were so focused on goal achievement that they missed all the opportunities that the present moment offered. Added to this, people often made the mistake of associating who they were and their self worth to the achievement of their goals. This kept people trapped in a life of constant pressure, and a need to control the people and events around them. People are not their goals, but they act as if they are. It is impossible to walk your authentic path when focused on a destination approach to life.
The journey is the goal. It is through letting go and allowing the journey to unfold that life gives you everything you need and more. Whilst Sarah and Sam had come to this conclusion, they also knew that it wasn’t a simple thing to do. It appears to be a counterintuitive approach to life because the brain is wired to want to control the external world. If control was the answer, then more people would be leading happier and more contented lives.
Sam had moved in with Sarah. They had both agreed it made sense. Sam and Clare had purchased an apartment which Sam had rented out when he went to the ashram. The rent he received covered his mortgage payments. Apart from the practicalities, they wanted to be together. Also, the energy in Sarah’s house was so much more conducive to the path they were both on at the moment.
Sam had returned to teaching primary school students. He had deliberately taken a casual teaching position because he wasn’t exactly sure what he wanted in a career at the moment. Sarah was in a similar position. Prior to going to the ashram, she had been a marketing executive. Upon returning to the ashram, she was uncertain what she needed to be doing with her life and career. She finally decided to stick with marketing until she had a stronger sense of what was right.
The company she had previously worked for had offered her old job back. It all had happened so serendipitously that she had seen it as a sign to accept their offer. She knew it was not her life’s calling, but it served a purpose until she was ready to step into her true purpose. Sarah had also discovered that any career or life purpose was only there to help you evolve into the truth of who you really are.
Most people made the mistake of thinking that achieving their life purpose was the most important focus. Again, this was just a trap of the ego mind to keep people caught in goal and destination mode. The true goal or destination of life was to live from a place of truth. Life was a journey which gave you everything you needed through people and circumstances to help you reach your ultimate destination of living the truth of who you really are. Life is always giving you feedback. The problem is that people judge events as being good or bad rather than containing endless possibilities and opportunities.
Sarah was in the kitchen; it was her turn to cook breakfast. Sarah and Sam always took time to cook breakfast on the weekends. During the week, they didn’t have time to enjoy a leisurely cooked breakfast, so they usually gave themselves the luxury of that on the weekends. As Sarah was attending breakfast, Sam walked in. “Hello gorgeous,” he announced with a big, disarming grin. “You were up early this morning,” he said as he walked up behind her and gave her a bear hug and planted a kiss on the top of her head.
Sarah momentarily stopped what she was doing and turned around to Sam and mischievously said, “well if you are going to give me a kiss, let’s make it a proper one”
“Why didn’t I think of that” he jokingly pronounced as he slapped his hand to his forehead. Then, in a more serious voice said, “let me fix this situation immediately” and kissed Sarah with all the love and tenderness he held in his heart for her.”
Sarah was the first to break the beautiful moment they were experiencing. “If I hadn’t gone to so much trouble to cook this amazing breakfast, I might have suggested ditching it for better things.”
“Well, there is always after breakfast for better things,” Sam suggested with one of his winning smiles.
“Truer words were never spoken by the maestro,” Sarah responded, emphasising the word maestro.
Over breakfast Sam asked Sarah, “was there a reason you were up so early this morning?”
“There was,” Sarah replied. “I had an interesting dream last night, and I got up early to see whether I could make any sense of it.”
“Would you like to share what the dream was?” Sam queried.
“Thought you would never ask,” Sarah quickly responded with her cheeky smile. “I dreamt I was in a big room with lots of people. In a corner of the large room was the master. He turned when he saw me looking at him and smiled. I tried to make my way through the crowd to speak with him. But every time I went to move forward, someone would stop me and ask me something. I did not want to appear rude, so I would stop and answer their questions. Because the room was so big and there were so many people, it took me a long time to reach the master. By the time I reached where he was standing, he was gone.”
“Interesting” commented Sam
“Yes, it was,” responded Sarah. “The dream ended there, and I awoke and thought ‘I wonder what that meant.’ I quickly fell back asleep, and I found myself in the same room with the master standing in the corner. Again I made my way to him and people stopped me to ask questions. Because I didn’t want to miss him this time, I politely excused myself when people tried to stop me. I had just about reached the master when a young child stopped me and asked, ‘could I help him find his mother?’ He was crying and very distressed and I immediately stopped and helped him find his mother. By the time I did that and looked across the room, the master had again disappeared.
“Wow, so you had a continuing dream. They do not happen all that often,” commented Sam in a surprised tone.
“Yes, that is true, and I was also a little shocked by this. So you can imagine my surprise when I found myself in the same dream. I was again standing in a big crowded room and saw the master standing in the room's corner. Again I made my way towards him, excusing myself when people stopped to ask me questions. Just as I was about to reach him, a woman stopped me and said ‘I have a message for you from your grandmother.’ I momentarily stopped, then quickly said I don’t have time right now and hurried on to reach the master. The master looked me in the eye and said, ‘glad to see you made it Sarah’. With that, I awoke from the dream. I found it impossible to get back to sleep, so I got up and started journaling the details before I forgot them.”
“Unbelievable Sarah. Three reoccurring dreams in one night is unusual. However, three reoccurring dreams involving the master. Surely there is a significant message there?” Sam concluded with.
“Yes, that is what I was thinking,” replied Sarah, deep in thought. “Sam, do you want to help me work out what the message is?”
“Thought you never ask,” Sam responded jokingly. “Seriously, though, Sarah, I feel it is really important for both of us to figure out what the dreams actually mean.”
“Yes, I am thinking the same thing, Sam. I believe the message is meant for both of us.”
“Okay,” said Sam, straightening himself in his chair, which usually meant he was ready for action. “How about we wash up the breakfast things and adjourn to our favourite room in the house, the lounge room? I just love the ambience of that room with its big bay windows and large double doors which overlook the garden. If it wasn’t raining, we could have sat outside. However, I have to admit I love the energy of that room, especially when it is raining.”
Sarah just smiled. Her grandparents had certainly built the perfect home. She loved living here, especially when you could feel her grandmother’s comforting presence everywhere.
Sarah and Sam quickly packed up the breakfast things and had the kitchen looking spic and span in no time. Soon they were seated together, with Sarah snuggling into Sam as they looked onto the beautiful garden.”
“Where do you propose we start Sarah?” Asked Sam.
“What about if we start at the first dream and work our way through each to see whether we can discern the master’s message?”
“Sounds like a good plan, Sarah,” Sam said as he gently kissed the top of her head.
Sarah smiled inwardly and had to master her emotions by saying to herself; ‘focus Sarah, this is no time to get distracted. You have things to figure out.’
“Okay,” Sarah announced, placing herself firmly in focus mode. “In the first dream, I saw the master. I went to cross the large room to see him, but I kept getting stopped by people. Not wanting to be rude, I stopped and answered their questions. By the time I reached where the master was standing, he was gone.”
“So we could conclude from that dream the people who stopped you caused you to miss the master.” Sam conjectured.
“Yes, that would be a logical explanation. It feels right to me, especially given the third dream. I think it is also important to work out what the people who stopped me represented. All three dreams had the same basic scenario. I see the master standing in the corner of a very crowed room. He smiles at me. I try to make my way to him, but I am stopped by various people in the room.” Sarah commented.
“So do you think, Sarah, it makes sense if all three dreams have the same scenario to look at what makes the dreams different? As well as why you reached the master in the third dream?” Queried Sam.
“Yes, you are right. That is going to be the easiest way to figure it out.” Sarah responded. “So in the first dream, people stopped me to ask questions, but I didn’t want to offend them, so I stopped and answered their questions. However, in doing that, I ended up missing the master.”
“So do you think Sarah the message there was you put other people’s needs before your own and in doing so you failed to meet up with the Master?” Sam queried.
“Yes, I think that is definitely part of it. I also think that people could also represent distractions in life. Not sure, so let’s park that and look at the second dream.” Sarah said pensively.
“Makes sense Sarah. Let’s see what happens when we cover all three dreams. We can always go back and look for any other hidden messages.” Sam said with a loving smile on his face.
It was now Sarah’s turn to give Sam a kiss on the cheek. He was too tall to reach higher than that. She also had to remind herself to focus. Talk about distractions.
Sarah continued. “In the second dream, it was as if I had learnt from the first dream that I would miss the master if I stopped and talked to people. So I politely excused myself and kept on moving towards the master. I would have reached him had the child not stopped me to ask for my help in finding his mother. The child was very upset. How could I possibly refuse to help him? However, the reality was by doing so I again missed the master. So was the master saying do not stop to help a child in need? That makes little sense.” Sarah queried.
“Maybe the question to be asked here is. In a room full of people, were you the only one capable of helping the child?” Said Sam.
Sarah thought about Sam’s question before responding, “I guess not. The child was in distress and approached me, so I took ownership of it. I could have asked someone else in the room to help the child, but it never crossed my mind. I just went immediately into rescue mode.”
“It is interesting, Sarah,” Sam said. “That we have discussed at length our tendency to play rescuer in other people’s lives. A rescuer always puts others’ needs ahead of their own because there is a secondary gain of feeling somehow important or needed when we rescue others. It is as if we use it to validate our existence. Yet rescuers keep both the victim and themselves stuck. Neither lives the life they are supposed to live. I always loved the saying if all you have is a hammer, then all you see is nails.”
“Thanks Sam for reminding me of that. Overcoming the rescuer complex is something we have both been working hard at.” Sarah mused. “It is the third dream that is interesting, Sam. When the women approached me with a message about my grandmother. Somehow, I knew not to stop and discuss with her what the message was. I intuitively knew that if I did, I would miss the master again. “
“Sarah, what do you think the women who tried to stop you with a message from your grandmother represented?”
“I think Sam she represented the emotional pulls and attachments we all have in our lives. They pull us in and often interfere with our intuition. They blind us to the intuitive messages which are always trying to guide our way. In the third dream, I had the courage to ignore the emotional pull of my grandmother and follow my intuition. It was saying do not stop or you will miss the master again. Sam, what do you think all this means?” Sarah asked Sam.
“I think the three dreams represent the journey we have been on lately. In dream one, we needed to learn not to get distracted by other people’s needs and focus on our own journey. That has been a tough lesson for both of us. We are both such givers and want to see others happy. However, we have learnt that in getting distracted by other people’s dramas, we lose sight of our journey in this lifetime. Also, I think you are right that the people stopping you also represents allowing ourselves to be distracted. Sometimes we can use other people and situations as a distraction from doing what we know needs to be done.”
“The second dream represented,” Sam continued. “Our belief that we are the only one capable of helping someone. We have a tendency to go into rescue mode thinking if we do not help, they will never resolve their issue. This is not the case and sometimes we are not the best person to assist. We have also learnt the lesson: give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach them how to fish and they feed themselves for life. We have learnt the futility of trying to rescue or save people. We have overcome the common misperception that by focusing on your journey, you are being selfish. You cannot find your truth if you are always distracted by other people’s drama’s. You just get caught in their drama and that is no use to anyone. First, conquer yourself and then empower others to conquer themselves. “
“Do you want to take over from here, Sarah?” Sam asked playfully.
“Absolutely. I now see where you are going with all of this,” Sarah said as she smiled at Sam. “The third dream represented our ability to listen to our intuition regardless of what strong emotional attachments we might have towards a person or situation. This was such a hard thing to learn and frankly Sam, if you had not been by my side constantly encouraging me to follow my intuition, I would never have learned this lesson. I am not saying I am perfect at this yet. However, everyday life gives me an opportunity to see if I will listen and follow my intuition. It is not always easy, but I am getting better at it thanks to your support and encouragement, Sam.”
“I wonder why I received this dream now, Sam?” Sarah asked.
Suddenly Sam sat up on the lounge and said, ”oh my goodness Sarah, I have just remembered something. Last night, the master also visited me. As you know, I am not as good at remembering dreams as you are. He gave me the message that it’s time. How could I have forgotten that?”
“Maybe you were not supposed to remember until now,” Sarah said, laughingly. It was true Sarah had a tendency to remember her dreams. Whereas Sam remembered his in bits and pieces, sometimes days later. Sarah didn’t believe in accidents and thought this was exactly how it was meant to be. She felt strongly they were meant to work out what the dreams meant together before Sam remembered the message.
Just as Sarah was thinking this, the phone rang. She jumped up off the lounge and said, “I’ll get it”.
Whilst Sarah was talking on the phone, Sam looked out into the garden. The rain had stopped, and the sun was just peeping through. The light made the raindrops on the flowers appear alive with a magical presence. Magic was in the air. Sam could feel it.
When Sarah walked back into the room, she had the most incredulous look on her face.
“Okay, spill the beans Sarah, who was on the phone?” Sam asked, laughing.
“You will never believe this. It was the master asking whether we were available to have lunch with him in the city. He is in town for a couple of days and wants to catch up with us.”
Now it was Sam’s turn to look shocked. “You are joking,” he said.
“Nope, I am certainly not Sam” and at that they both burst out laughing.